01 February 2011

What's A Girl to Do?


Dalliant: Can you believe this CONTROVERSY?


Dalliant: Don't play coy with me, Dainty. It's everywhere. Literally everyone is talking about it.

Dainty: Um, Egypt?

Dalliant: Have you even read this blog?

Dainty: I mean, I don't know, maybe we're taking a more serious approach to the world in 2011.

Dalliant: *shrug*

Dainty: So do tell me, what blog appropriate CONTROVERSY are we talking about?

Dalliant: Black Swan. Costumes. Please tell me you're with me.

Dainty: Oh a hint! Um, how audiences are asked to perceive the garishly condescending color choices as some sort of poetic depth?

Dalliant: Well yes, but that's not what I'm talking about.

Dainty: How Natalie Portman kept losing weight so they had to keep redesigning the costumes to fit her wilting frame?

Dalliant: I thought we made a rule not to discuss the NaPo Swan Diet anymore?

Dainty: Ugh. Whatever. Ok, well maybe it's how Vanity Fair, Vogue, Refinery 29, Elle, and The New York Times have all turned into salivating fan boys just because Kate and Laura Mulleavy were involved?

Dalliant: You're very close.

Dainty: How Natalie Portman confused us all when she pronounced their line's name Row-Dahr-Tey, even though I guess if she's saying it like that it must be the real pronunciation and not Row-Dart?

Dalliant: What?

Dainty: The feathers they used? For the tutu? Something animal rights related?

Dalliant: No.

Dainty: Was Natalie forced to wear non-Vegan shoes?

Dalliant: You're not even trying anymore.

Dainty: I'm bored.

Dalliant: Well if you must know you uninformed fool, the Mulleavy sisters have launched a two woman press campaign on the costumes they designed for Black Swan. You'd think Rodarte was responsible for the whole freaking film.

Dainty: Right, yeah, I just mentioned that. Are you about to break the news that Natalie Portman is engaged and pregnant here too?

Dalliant: Ha. Funny.

Dainty: Sorry. Please proceed.

Dalliant: So Kate and Laura have been out and about, darlings of the fashion world and the blogging set that they are, launching a "poor us" campaign because they didn't get enough credit for their contribution to the film and realized too late the very well known restrictions surrounding Oscar nominations and Union membership requirements. Meanwhile, the actual Costume Designer, Amy Westcott, is all "what the hell, this is my movie, I thought we were friends" and decided to call their bluff in a fairly aggressive way during an interview with Clothes on Film.

Dainty: But this is kind of normal right? Don't designers collaborate with film costume designers all the time?

Dalliant: Sure, but they usually aren't happy in the end. Edith Head famously won an Oscar for Best Costume Design for Sabrina (1954) and didn't even mention Hubert de Givenchy in her remarks.

Dainty: And he designed most of the iconic looks in Sabrina, right?

Dalliant: Right, but he certainly wasn't responsible for everything. The award is for Costume Design overall. Not just the flashy outfits that everyone remembers.

Dainty: But we probably wouldn't even be talking about these films if it weren't for the so-called flashy outfits.

Dalliant: And yet someone has to be in charge, and sometimes that includes bringing on collaborators and even making sure the less glamorous costumes make sense. Besides, only the top billed can be nominated for an Oscar and that's Amy Westcott.

Dainty: So, essentially if Amy Westcott wins the Oscar she just needs to thank the sisters and all will be fine, right?

Dalliant: Well, sure, I guess. But that won't be happening.

Dainty: Why the hell not?

Dalliant: Black Swan wasn't nominated for Best Costume Design.

Dainty: So WHAT exactly is the controversy?

Dalliant: I have no idea.

Dainty: I hate you.


JAK said...

Your blog personified! Now I'm going to start talking to it as I read. I think Dainty and I would be tight.

ldbahr said...

The schism between the egos was really becoming hard to conceal. Thought it best to announce it to the world.

Kyle said...



ldbahr said...

Yes, Kyle. That is correct.


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